Livevine

Let’s talk about something that gets in the way of personal success — urges.

An urge propels a person to take some form of action. If you get the urge to register for this year’s election, the action taken as a result may be a satisfying one–urge accomplished. On the other hand, if you get the urge to eat an entire box of See’s chocolates in one sitting, that’s an urge that doesn’t serve you well if your goal is to lose last year’s accumulated weight.  

What do you do when these urges strike? Give in or abstain? Do you manage the urge or do urges manage you?

Here’s a technique to get you thinking differently about an object of desire. I’m going to use a piece of chocolate for this demonstration since I happen to have an entire box of candy sitting next to my keyboard (food for thought). I’ve taken one out of the box for analysis. 10 or more points I eat the chocolate. Negative 10 or more I abstain.

Step 1: Start with a ranking

Using a scale of 1 to 10, rank the desire to give in to a particular urge (i.e., eat the piece of chocolate.) For this example, I’ll say I’m at a +2.

Step 2: Positive Visualization

What would it take to eat the chocolate? 

• If it were filled with caramel, I would add +2 points.
• If it were dark chocolate, I would add another +2 points.
• If I hadn’t eaten all day, I’d add another +4 points.
• And if it was deliciously decadent chocolate, I’d add another +10 points.

More than likely…there’s a high probability of eating the chocolate.

Step 3: Negative visualization

What would it take to NOT eat the chocolate?

• If I knew it was filled with some awful tasting creme filling I’d give that a -5. Yuck.
• If I knew someone had fingered it with their dirty hands, that would be a big -10
• If it had been sitting opened up on a dusty shelf for 3 years, I’d deduct -10 more points.

There’s a good chance I’d walk away from the chocolate.

Herein lies the key. By visualizing either way, you control your urges. To make the urge stronger simply visualize the positive nature of what you desire. You can make an urge weaker by visualizing negatively. By rethinking the object of your desire, you increase the ability to manage the urge.

If you’re curious, I actually put the lid on the chocolate.