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If I asked your closest friend which of the following words would describe you best, what would they choose? Are you a humanbeing first, or a humandoing?

This may be a painful question to ask a typical high achieving, go getting, doer, type A personality.  In fact, it may bring up some frustration, anger or even avoidance.

What matter’s most is not what someone else thinks, but how fulfilled you feel with the life you’ve chosen for yourself.

Do you enjoy being busy, productive, and living a life filled with accomplishments? If so, then congratulations on living your life on purpose.

On the other hand, if you are like many of those that find their way into my practice, the truth lies closer to “I’m just tired of it all. I feel like I’m running faster than I have strength all the time.” Many are too busy to even analyze why they are so busy. They’ve grown accustomed to, and even take pride in, their amazing ability to “get things done.” They find themselves stuck in a ”humandoing” world. The more competent they become, the more they are asked to take on. The more they take on, the more fatigued, worn out, and exhausted they feel.  High productivity is frequently reinforced by co-workers, partners, friends and even family members who have much to gain from the productive behavior.

If you were to ask many of these people what they wished they had more of, the word most frequently share may be “balance.” They’d like feel productive but fulfilled in their personal and professional lives. 

Since high acheivers derive much of their self-worth from what they do versus who they are, the thought of change can be frightening.

Who am I if I don’t perform to other’s expectations?

Sometimes we need to remind ourselves that we are first and foremost human beings, endowed with unique qualities and gifts worthy of esteem, admiration, and respect. Regardless of what we get done, or let slip  by for a wiser purpose, our lives have meaning and purpose merely because we exist.

For those that wish to shed their image as a human doer, the first step is to honor that part of you that desires change. You’re feeling stressed, burned out and fatigued for a reason. Listen to your inner voice. Trust your intuition. It’s right more often than you might suspect.

Ask yourself this question next time you feel like you are taking on too much . . .

“If I say yes to this, what am I saying no to?”

I grew up with a father who loved the great outdoors. He passed on this gift to me and it has become a source of strength and guidance throughout my life. Connecting with nature reminds me of the Walt Whitman quote, “With every leaf a miracle.” To make a statement like this, one would need to be observant of life in all it’s magnificence.

When is the last time you took a pause and reconnected with nature? Do you find yourself anxiously engaged in so many projects that there is no time to sit on the grass and feel the texture against your skin? Do you recall that sense of awe and wonder experienced the first time you scooped up sand in your hand and let it sprinkle from your palm? 

What will you pause and notice today?

Maybe this has happened to you. You find yourself faced with an issue that you are not able to resolve the way you’d like. Your shoulder’s tighten, your patience shortens, and you begin to feel stressed. Instead of treating your loved ones with respect, you snap, yell or grow irritated. As you analyze your own behavior, you start to feel depressed at your inability to control your emotions. Discouraged that you can’t do it all, you doubt yourself and your ability to achieve your goals.

Welcome to the stress, anxiety depression lifecycle. One way of interrupting this circular struggle is to reduce stress and increase your ability to accept, adapt or change the way you view the problem.

Numerous studies by health professionals and psychologists alike have confirmed the importance of exercise in reducing symptoms associated with stress, anxiety and depression. UT Southwestern Medical Center studied adults aged 20 to 45 on the effects of exercise on depression. They found that “depressive symptoms were reduced almost 50 percent in individuals who participated in 30-minute aerobic exercise sessions three to five times a week.” This is a fairly significant reduction in mild to moderate depression.

At Heavensfield, I have implemented short walks to both treatment facilities as a means of promoting health and wellness.

What type of exercise will you introduce into your life that will help mitigate the effects of stress?